Having dated the wrong guys extensively for the last several years, I realized that I must be doing something wrong. Or lets put it this way, maybe I should read the so called experts on this topic and see how I could change things. And so I signed up for several newsletters. A lot of it is drivel if I can through even half a page of many of them. They all say things that are the antithesis of the way I think. Yet, I read on.
The following irked me the most at first. Then I thought, “there is some truth to some of it.” – you decide:
Imagine this: How much “input” does a man receive in a day?
How much is coming at him every single day? Messages, requests, questions, problems – from work, from the media, from his friends and family…?
Now – imagine how in the world YOU’RE supposed to cut through all that so he can really hear you and give you what you need?
Love has a sort of “marketing” component to it. (Especially when you want to be clear with a man and he’s got so much stuff coming at him, a short attention span, and doesn’t necessarily even WANT to hear what you have to say.)
An effective “marketer” knows that in order for her product and message to stand out, it needs to be very clear, to the point, and it absolutely needs to leave out all the stuff a prospective customer DOESN’T need to hear! You want to leave out anything that’ll make your message get lost among everything else competing for the “customer’s” attention.
Any marketing message – if it’s going to get results – needs to cut through “the clutter.” If the message is unclear, too complex, or too long, it doesn’t CUT THROUGH. The marketer fails to engage the customer. In essence, the message falls on deaf ears.
Here’s a powerful little “speech” for you in this situation – a simple yet amazingly effective Love Script:
“I’m feeling really angry right now. It doesn’t feel good to wait, and it doesn’t feel good to keep my friends waiting, either. I don’t want to be complaining all the time, and I really don’t know what to do. What do you think we could do to fix this?”
This is the end of the cut and paste from the newsletter that maybe I won’t mention the name of.
Now this is me, speaking:
Really? I need to treat a guy like a porcelain doll and mangle my words, walk on eggshells, so he doesn’t get bent out of shape, misunderstand me or the best move many of them seem to love – run away?
Please. Give me a break.
I was just talking to a friend of mine about this very thing last night and we came to the conclusion that men are not walking around thinking how they should say something to us or what they should do? They just say as they feel – as it should be and do as they feel – which is also how it should be … within reason of course.
So what is it that I am saying here?
I have come to the conclusion that when two people are right for each other whether they are in the beginning of a relationship or when one is deep into it – both parties don’t have to read newsletters to help them on how to speak to the other. Both people can be themselves and everything falls into place rather easily and nicely.
Agree? Disagree? I would love to hear what you think.
Until I date again!